Cravings.

I'm currently sitting here, at the University (in the science A to be exact), watching people pass by just thinking; How many of these people know the creator of the sun and the stars? How many of these people are lost? How many are searching for something? Something bigger, greater than themselves. Earlier today I watched a documentary that a friend showed me, it was all about the secular world and the cravings that people have. Intrisic cravings for... something more. People in this place are broken and wandering. We have to reach them. But not in a condeming way, but out of love. A sinciere deep and real love for the lost. They need to meet you. They need you just as much as I do, and do I ever. Lord, pour out  your spirit on this campus. These are your children. It's going to rain. I feel so ambitious to say, We need to win this campus over for Christ. I'm sitting here listening to worship on my computer and I feel like I could get up and spin around and dance and lift my hands in worship. I feel your presence here, and it makes me want to cry thinking that the people around me don't. Seems like an overwhelming task at this point, but all things are possible through you who strengthens me. All things. Even this. Lord, I pray for devine appointments. Place me in people's lives who need light in darkness. Seat me in that class right next to someone who needs even a conversation or a smiple smile today. I want to be the light you have created me to be. This is my inspiration today; "You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:15 Let this scripture ring true today. Give me boldness. Encourage me. Sometimes it gets so discouraging, thinking I am all alone in this. But just when I need it, God shows up. I sit down in Mac Hall with my lunch and it so happens that I sat beside two Christians - I could tell by the first time they opened thier mouths that they were. They were talking about this exact thing, encouraging one another in Christ. They don't even know how much I was encouraged simply by listening to them, feeling like I am not alone in my purpose. It was quite beautiful. Thanks Abba, You are not only the King of the church, but you are the King of this University. Freedom reigns in this place. Showers of mercy and grace, Falling on every face. There is freedom. Jesus reigns in this place. 

Staying Soft Hearted.

I feel like what I am about to share is a little more personal than usual, but I told you all at the beginning that it doesn’t matter who reads it or doesn’t read it. It’s a documentation of not only my time on the mountain but also my times of struggle in the valley. I know that God is always speaking to us but sometimes I just forget to listen. So I wasn’t expecting to hear from God and it caught me off guard. He said, Em you are starting to become hard hearted and bitter towards the church, we need to work on this together. And I realised that yes, I have been feeling bitter and turned off to the idea of the church for several reasons. Now that I am starting to get more involved in the workings of the church I see that it is not just happy go lucky all the time, I see a very different and dark side of ministry than what I used to believe existed. So often I take the burdens of other people on my shoulders and it is so, so hard for me not to. It’s an everyday struggle to know the line between empathy and sympathy. I also see much conflict within the church. I see conflict between churches, denominations and congregations and I don’t like it. Church is supposed to be where we come united to meet with God but I see conflict and it’s not lining up with my ideals about this thing we call church. I’ve seen people get hurt by other people, fighting over theology... I know there is nothing wrong with theology but lately I’ve been noticing how caught up people get in it and they seem to forget the main reason we are called Christians. Now, I have talked this over with my dad and he made me realize that yes the church is messed up sometimes, because it’s full of people... human people that are not perfect, but still even among all the mess it is a good thing. Meeting with other believers is a good thing... it is necessary. And I need to remind myself about the good it can bring instead of focusing on the bad. I need to remain soft hearted. God please help me to find the strength in you to fight bitterness and anger in my life. I would love some feedback on this one... So please feel free to comment. Be blessed.

Imaginative ramblings.

I'm standing in a field. A beautiful, big, bright feild of cream coloured weat that reaches up to my waist. As the weat is moved by the wind, it dances around me in rythm. The sun hits my face and I close my eyes and take in the scene. I take a deep breath and a sweet smell fills my nose and clean crisp air enters my lungs. This is such a refreshing place. It is abnormally quiet here, I notice the absence of noise. There are no cars honking or people talking or bells ringing... it is completly peaceful. I feel no need for anything, I am not striving nor worrying. I have never been here before but already I feel like I belong, like I've known this place my whole life in the back of my mind. I get lost in my thoughts about this strange place when I realise I'm not alone. Off a little while into the distance I see a man. There really is no way I can put words to discribe this man. He is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. The beauty of the field seems to dull as I look at this figure straight ahead. Just at this moment I seemed to discover a new instinct that I had never known about before but I knew it was the right thing to do. I started to run. I sprinted as fast and as hard as I could, but I never grew weary. My eyes were set on Him and as long as I was looking at Him I could run forever. His arms were open wide and he was bending at the knee, just like a Father would when he greets his little children. I felt like a child, I'm sure I looked like a child too. I rushed into him and it was the best feeling. He enveloped me with a huge hug. It was the kind of hug that could stop tears, ease fears and fix broken hearts. We fell over into the weat, both laughing now like old friends. As we settled, I lay with my head against His chest simply satisfied in listening to his heart beat. I could stay in this moment forever. I lost track of time, It could have been minutes, days or years and I wouldn't have been able to tell the difference. But then I noticed one more thing, A little tiny bird pearched on my shoulder. I knew this bird too. Even though I had never seen it before I knew lots about it, It was my guide, full of wisdom and aide. It was a beautiful gift. It chirped and I noted how quiet its sound was. I thought about home and how loud it is back there. It made me think about how I needed to memorize the sound of its voice. I wanted to know its voice. I never wanted to be at the place where I couldn't hear it, or recognize it. I made a mental note of its pitch, volume and ring and I smiled. It pecked my hair with its beak and flew away. Instictively, I rose and chased it, laughing a deep and real laugh. It remained just above my reach as I jumped and tried to tag it. It was a fun game. If birds could smile, this bird was smiling. The Man started to laugh too. It felt like we were a family. I liked this place and I knew in my heart it was where I belonged.

2011

This year is going to be different. This year is going to be full of new things, learning, growing and changing. Over the past few months I have seen God's hand move not only in my own life, but in the lives of those around me more than I have ever seen before. It hasn't been easy, but it was well worth it. I am expecting Him to continue this work in the new year, I am expecting God to continue to move, mould and shape us into the people he wants us to be. This upcoming year will be a time of awakening and revival. Revival comes by two things, When the people of God take old concepts and again realize their truth. It is when we stop taking things for granted and re-discover the idea of the Cross. We need to re-discover his love and forgiveness. The second part is applying it to our lives. It is not simply enough to learn something and store it away to collect dust, but we have to bring these concepts into our everyday living! We need to own the love God has towards us, we need realise the authority we have being children of the living God, we need to forgive others just as the He forgave us because of the cross. We need to re-discover and apply. Re-discover and apply and repeat. This is how revival happens. It's not something mystical and mysterious but it is when we get off our butts and start acting like true Jesus followers not just a bunch of 'religious christians'. We are not simply religious, our God is different than all "others". The difference between our Jesus and all the other religious prophets is that they came and they died, they taught what they were to teach and they died. BUT our messiah is ALIVE. He is not dead but He is always teaching us. He is alive and that is why revival is possible in our lives, in our schools, in our workplaces, in our city... and yes even in our churches. Because this good news, THE good news is for everyone, it is the one and only truth. If you don't like that... I'm sorry but it's true. He is the way, the truth and the life. It is him alone. This year, when I speak to people I know are not believers I am not going to hide anything because the truth is not just "relative to each situation" It is the foundation of who I am and I will not change that fact. People are going to persecute you and harm you, but the Lord your God will never forsake you. Be strong fellow Christ lovers, because we are his Children and in all things he will work it for our good! We can see lives changed in 2011. We WILL see it. Let's pray-in the new year and stay strong. Let our hearts take courage in Him. Give up your small ambitions people! Give up your small dreams! Our God is bigger than that. Re-realise that truth... and apply it. Well... What are you waiting for? Go!

Just a thought.

"Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. ¹³ For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. ¹⁴ Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.
 ¹⁵ Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. ¹⁶ And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. ¹⁷ If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? ¹⁸ But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. ¹⁹ If they were all one part, where would the body be? ²⁰ As it is, there are many parts, but one body.
 ²¹ The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” ²² On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, ²³ and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, ²⁴ while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, ²⁵ so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. ²⁶ If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.
 ²⁷ Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. ²⁸ And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. ²⁹ Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? ³⁰ Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? ³¹ Now eagerly desire the greater gifts."

I find this scripture very encouraging today, We are all here for a purpose, for a reason. God is the master of creative design. He has made everyone different and unique. We all have different gifts, talents and personalities. Who is to say God uses one more than another? We need to stop all trying to be the same because He made us the way we are for a reason, It's not simply coincidence. God doesn't do coincidence. You are not a mistake. You are made for a purpose.

Food for thought; A friend once said to me, that if you are still living here on earth there is a reason. If God was done with you, If you had finished all that you were meant to finish, If you had lived out his purpose for your life in full of his will... You wouldn't be still living. If you are still alive, there is a reason you are still alive. Our god is not void of purpose, He is not random, He is a purpose-filled-powerful God who made you exactly how he wanted you - Fearfully and wonderfully made. Start living like it.

Signs.

So I've been kinda really focused on school this past week. University final exams have been insane. I don't think I've ever been so stressed out in my entire life. To be honest, I've been so busy studying that I haven't had much time to spend with God. It's really not a good thing. But it's the truth. But something cool happened to me yesterday, God literally spoke to me through a sign. I was driving down 16th ave and I'm stopped in the traffic and I look over and see this sign in the front yard of a church. It says, Worry ends where faith begins. That really struck me. Why am I so stressed out? Like, to give you guys an idea about how stressed I was, I had two nervous breakdowns/panic attacks, I made myself sick and I can't sleep and I forget to eat because I'm so focused on the studies. I haven't talked to any of my friends in over a week... It's been so awful. But this sign really was just a reminder that I don't need to be that worried about things. It is all in God's hands. I will do my best, and give the rest to him. And that's all I can do. I guess I just needed a sign to tell me that. God speaks pretty loud some days. I'm so thankful for it.

His will for my life.

So I've been reading Francis Chan's book "Forgotten God"
I just want to put an excerpt that really caught me off guard, it made me think, I like it, I hope you will too.

"How many times have you heard someone say, "I just wish I knew God's will for my life"? I know I've longed for this before. But now I see it as a misguided way of thinking and talking.
There are very few people in the Scriptures who received their life plan from God in advance (or even their five-year plan, for that matter!). Consider Abraham, who was told to pack up his family and all his possessions and start walking. He didn't know where he was going. He didn't know if he would ever be back. He didn't know any of the details we consider vital. (e.g., his destination, how long the venture would take, what the costs/rewards would be, whether he'd recieve a 401(k) or health insurance). God said to go and he went, and that's pretty much all he knew.
I think a lot of us need to forget about God's will for my life. God cares more about our response to His Spirit's leading today, in this moment, than about what we intend to do next year. In fact, the decisions we make next year will be profoundly affected by the degree to which we submit to the Spirit right now, in today's decisions.
It is easy to use the phrase "God's will for my life" as an excuse for inaction or even disobedience. It's much less demanding to think about God's will for your future than it is to ask him what he wants you to do in the next ten minutes. Its safer to commit to following him someday instead of this day.
To be honest, I believe part of the desire to "Know God's will for my life" is birthed in fear and results in paralysis. We are scared to make mistakes, so we fret over figuring out God's will. We wonder what living according to his will would actually look and feel like, and we are scared to find out. We forget that we were never promised a twenty-year plan of action; instead, God promises multiple times in Scripture never to leave or forsake us.
God wants us to listen to his spirit on a daily basis, and even throughout the day, as difficult and stretching moments arise, and in the midst of the mundane. My hope is that instead of searching for "God's will for my life", each of us would learn to seek hard after "the Spirit's leading in my life today." May we learn to pray for an open and willing heart, to surrender to the Spirit's leading with that friend, child, spouse, circumstance, or decision in our lives right now."